It was a beautiful Friday at the heart of Dubai when we found ourselves emerged into a fruitful day’s retreat in Rayhaan by Rotana in Al Ghurair, Dubai, talking and discussing marriage in its biblical context. We believed it was the right decision we made to invest our time and money, to sit in there and listen to the speakers, and to make a commitment to apply what we learned.
1. Be encouraged by people who can bring the best in us.
Known for his renowned works in the field of motivational and wealth coaching, Ferdinand “Chinkee” Tan spent most of his time helping both Filipinos and expatriates build wealth the biblical way. Mr. Chink Positive, who is a former member of Randy Santiago’s “hawi boys”, is the author of the best-selling book ‘TILL DEBT DO US PART’. Together with his loving wife Nove-Ann, Chinkee gave us excellent tips on how to address unavoidable issues and undeniable messes in our marriage.
2. It is always good to learn from the wise.
Chinkee and Nove-Ann are no perfect couples. Yet they are able to live a healthy marriage. We admired their generosity for sharing what they’ve gone through and how they’ve responded to each situation. Based on their own real life experiences, Chinkee emphasized the need to acknowledge, first and foremost, the fact that marriage is not about us. Quietly listening to him, we realized that he is right. With this in mind, it would allow us to be full of God and less of ourselves which would consequently make our marriage look good before God.
3. A healthy marriage calls for an effective communication and a lifestyle of correction.
Another important aspect of marriage that was highlighted during their talk is communication by means of connection between a husband and a wife. That is why we strongly recommend married couples to attend Chinkee’s seminars. As he noted, we all can choose the decisions we make but we cannot choose the consequences we face. Another note to self is this: A lifestyle of correction is a must in marriage. We never stop learning. We never stop asking help so we can be led to the direction God has for us.
4. Setting right money priorities is very crucial.
One of the hottest topics that caught our attention is money talks in marriage. Troubled finances are the usual cause of marital fights and conflicts. But money is not really the problem. It is the way we handle it. Chinkee stressed out that our goal should be financial responsibility rather than stability. He even pointed out a 5-step strategy that could lead to a “financially ever after”. Plus convincing us to stop living in fear and start living in faith, whether in lack or in plenty for God is not limited to this economy! Again, it is highly recommended to go and book a seat in Chinkee Tan’s seminars and events.
5. Making our marriage missional is a win-win strategy.
Living beyond our marriage to fulfill our mission that God called us to be is so important yet many of us missed the point. Inspired by Chinkee and Nove-Ann’s powerful marriage which is guided by their mission statements, we believed that this is worth doing as well.
All of us are work-in-progress. There is a lot to learn. And here’s a website of Chinkee Tan’s that one may find helpful www.chinkeetan.com.